Mortaljive: The Rest is Silence

There is no still point in all the Universe, and that is the rock upon which I stand

Monday, June 02, 2008

Dick Cheney Declared Shogun



The offspring of centuries of inbreeding and lip snarling, Richard "Penis" Cheney* was formally declared "The American Shogun" and given the Western United States as his own to rule as he sees fit. Nicknamed "Watch Where You're Aiming That Cheney" he rose in national politics above all other contenders to steer the country away from the abyss of reason and sustainability, and towards the glory of massive short-term profits and lawyer face pocking. Little known fact: Mr. C routinely had his hand so far up President Bush's ass he could tickle George's front teeth with his thumb!

*Collect all of the Cheney Family Cards series! Win a flask of bourbon! Gain a chance to go human shooting with America's Vice President, the Ruler of the World! Eat of his flesh and despair!

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